The Power of Positive Thinking
This morning, Elvis Duran and the Morning Show talked about the importance of positive thinking. I needed to hear that today, otherwise you would be getting a very long rant about shirking responsiblity. Shit happens, and this shit was terrible. The rant would be childish and stupid, so I’m trying to find the positive.
When I need a boost in confidence, I think of all of you, watching this blog and my other social media for announcements. I don’t want to let you down. I must keep writing, blogging, and attempting to publish, even if I have not yet found success.
If I still need to lift my spirts, I start naming everyone and everything for which I am grateful. I’ve been telling Lemur how grateful I am for him every day.
I’m grateful to all of you for sticking with me. I’m grateful to my family and friends for understanding my social anxiety. I’m grateful for my imagination when I need a distraction in uncomfortable situations. I’m grateful for being here, living this life, writing these words on a Tuesday night when I could be rocking back and forth, unable to cope with the world.
I still think about suicide. It’s still the first response when something terrible happens, or when I’m overwhelmed with responsibility. I still feel responsible when someone attacks my friends, my tribe, or my genre.
I’ve had to distance myself from people who are constantly critical and negative. The downward spiral of self realization exists. That’s one rabbit hole I won’t allow myself to follow.
I don’t need your permission to write. I don’t need your thoughts or prayers to get through the day. I am positive enough for all of us. I appreciate your thoughts and prayers, however. I also appreciate anyone thankful for this blog. It’s saved my sanity more than once. I hope it does the same for you.